A letter to Troy:
I know I owe you a real letter but the thoughts are in my head now and with Audie sleeping on me it’s easier to blog on my phone than to grab a pen and paper – don’t worry I’ll still send you a letter later. For now, here’s this for you and everyone else to read because sometimes I think some people see we have a crazy beautiful life but our colorful life is splattered with struggle and it is because we continually make it through the struggles that our marriage is strong.
11 years ago we stood in front of God, our family and friends, and convalidated our marriage. During our vows I cried during the “in sickness and health” part and you gave me your goofy grin. I was crying because we were already living that and your smile validated to me how you think I’m a fool for thinking you’d ever walk away from me when the going got tough. Just weeks before our marriage we weren’t sure if I would be able to make it to the altar. I’ve never seen a dress maker so pissed that she had to make last minute alterations to a dress since I had lost so much weight in the last couple of weeks. The time leading up to our ceremony was terrible. We were hundreds of miles apart, I was up in Massachusetts sick and in the hospital or constantly at doctors offices once discharged. You had to be in Nashville still. I didn’t think you would come that weekend. You did though, you showed up and did everything I wanted and I know I pissed you off because I was still worried about the wedding ceremony and you didn’t care about that anymore all you cared about was that I was still here.
11 years later and I’m still sick and I still infuriate you. We live with my unpredicatable disease. We live an active duty army life where we are constantly separated and on opposite sides of the world. You still get mad at me because I still worry that you’ll back away from me and you still think I’m a fool for that. We love eachother so fiercely it hurts sometimes.
Every single one of those vows we have lived each side of [well maybe not the rich part] over the last 11 years. We have struggled, our path still has wrong turns, stumbles and falls. Yet I know that I am the luckiest through it all because you are with me on this journey of life. You are my home and my adventure all at once and I’m thankful that I know I have you till death do us part.
Mr. Troy, thank you for always loving me. Hopefully in November we will finally get our honeymoon when we go to Vegas.